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When a relationship runs into serious difficulties, most people assume that there’s only one path forward: find a solicitor and let them decide how best to proceed. In reality though, there’s at least three genuinely different routes, with family solicitors being just one of these options. Getting this choice right can save you time, money and a good amount of unnecessary stress; getting it wrong can mean paying for legal representation that you didn’t need, or trying to manage something on your own that was always going to need proper legal advice. There’s rarely a single ‘right answer’ that applies to everyone, which is part of why this decision trips so many people up.
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For some couples, particularly where there’s no children involved and finances have already been separated amicably, it’s genuinely possible to manage a divorce application without instructing a solicitor at all. The relevant forms can be downloaded directly from the Family Court and since the introduction of no-fault divorce, the process no longer requires either party to prove wrongdoing.
That said, ‘straightforward’ is doing a lot of work in that sentence. Even a divorce that looks simple on paper can raise questions that aren’t obvious until they matter, particularly around pensions, or property. A financial settlement still needs to be agreed, or an application made to the court, before a final order can be granted; that step can be very easy to underestimate if you’re managing everything yourself. Getting even a one-off conversation with a family solicitor before you begin is often hugely beneficial.
Mediation is often the step taken when the divorce or separation becomes contentious. It brings both parties together with an independent, trained mediator to work through practical decisions such as arrangements for children or sorting out finances and assets in a setting that’s deliberately less formal and less confrontational than court. For anyone applying to court for a financial order or a child arrangements order, attending a Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting is usually a required first step anyway, so it’s rarely wasted time.
What mediation isn’t, though, is legal advice. A mediator can help you and your ex-partner to reach an agreement but they can’t tell either of you what your legal rights actually are. Nor can they turn that agreement into something legally binding on their own. That’s a distinction that people we speak with often miss; an agreement reached in mediation still generally needs a solicitor involved at some point to convert it into a consent order or a separation agreement with proper legal standing.
As members of Resolution, the family law team at Wayman & Long are strong advocates for this kind of constructive approach wherever possible and where you don’t already have a mediator in mind, we’d be happy to recommend one.
There’s a point when mediation and DIY forms genuinely aren’t enough and usually it comes down to one of a few things: assets that are complicated enough to need proper legal and financial input or in worst case situations, there’s risk to a partner or a child.
Financial settlements are a common trigger, especially where pensions or a family business need to be valued and divided fairly, rather than just split down the middle by agreement. In these cases, a family solicitor’s involvement stops being optional and becomes essential to make sure that you’re receiving what’s fair. The same applies where a business or farm is involved; something that we see fairly often here in Suffolk, as these cases tend to need a different level of care than dividing straightforward savings. This is because valuations, tax implications and the future of a working business often all need to be considered together.
Children can also tip a case from mediation into something that needs a solicitor, particularly where parents can’t reach agreement on where a child should live or how much time they should spend with each parent. If these matters escalate, the case will need to go before the court as a Child Arrangement Order. Safety is the other clear line. Where there are concerns about domestic abuse, our family law team can advise on protective orders, including non-molestation orders and occupation orders, and also represent you through that process. This isn’t something mediation is designed for and isn’t something that you should be navigating through a downloaded form.
It’s also worth knowing that these routes aren’t mutually exclusive. Many clients that we see predominantly manage the process themselves by using mediation to reach an agreement on most issues and then bring in a family solicitor for one specific part, such as drafting a legally-sound consent order or representing them at a single hearing. This kind of unbundled support tends to be far more affordable than full representation from start to finish, without leaving you to work out the legal details entirely on your own.
The honest answer to ‘do I need a family solicitor’ is usually: it depends on what you’re actually facing, not on how a case looks from the outside. Two divorces that may seem similar on paper can actually need completely different levels of support. The only way to truly know which one you’re dealing with is to talk it through with someone who can see the whole picture.
At Wayman & Long, we’re happy to have that conversation early, before you’ve committed to any particular route. As members of Resolution, our approach favours working things out constructively wherever possible, which sometimes means that advising a client to undertake mediation or fill out forms themselves, is genuinely a better fit than paying for full representation.
To discuss your situation confidentially, get in touch with our family law team, or find out more about family law and mediation, separation and divorce on our website.
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